Anyone who knew my mom knew she adopted a kind of "hippie" outlook on life. Live for the moment. Enjoy the moment. Enjoy the little things. This morning, as I was driving in to work I heard one of my favorite songs from my childhood "Where Do The Children Play?" by Cat Stevens. This song made me think about mom and her outlook on life, and how mine has changed so much from those childhood days.
Changes Every Day
Every day it seems I am bombarded with images of some new gadget that is suppose to make my life easier. Low and behold, not too long later I find myself in line with everyone else to purchase the new gadget. A new iPod touch, when my iPod classic worked just as fine. A new DroidX phone when my Droid was just as sufficient. A mini cupcake maker when my cupcake pans would have made the same product. When did I lose sight of the real meaning of things? When did things become so much more complicated?
Simpler Days
Growing up, I was blessed with two parents who dedicated their lives to giving their children everything that we needed. Not everything we wanted, but everything we needed. I remember our frequent road trips that led no where instead of annual vacations to Disney World. I remember the fun we had driving an hour to go to the grocery store, even though we didn't get that new CD we wanted. I remember my parents doing everything they could to give us what we needed. I wouldn't trade those road trips for anything. Most of my favorite memories are of those road trips. The arguing in the back seat. My brother telling me that I sucked at singing. Complaining my sister was cramping me in the backseat, all while mom and dad sat in the front, enjoying the view.
"Well We Cracked the Sky, Scrappers Fill the Air"...
Now, as a 27 year old, I can't seem to find these simpler ways again. I'm stuck on the idea that I have to work every extra shift that I have the opportunity to instead of taking the time to go see my family or spend time with friends. I find myself driving 70 miles per hour down the freeway instead of taking the county roads and enjoying the scenery like we did as kids. If we're speeding so quickly through life, how are we suppose to enjoy all of the little things? We're too busy passing them up.
Change is Needed...
After losing mom this past year and spending my life since then on this fast track, it has become blatantly clear (with the help of a wonderful man and a fantastic co-worker and friend) that I need to slow down, find the simple days, and enjoy life (or throw my planner away as one of them would say). Knowing how short life can be and how quickly things can change, I need to enjoy these things and enjoy those I love. I need to live life more like mom did. In the past 10 months, the majority of my memories of her were of her last days, her last hours. Seeing that over and over in your head is hard, almost debilitating. It wasn't my mom. However, the past few days, I've seen more images of my mom smiling, laughing. I've seen images of mom sitting on the deck in the front yard playing with the kittens, chasing Daisy, planting her flowers. In each and every one of these memories, mom is smiling and enjoying these little things that I have been passing up.
Change is needed....
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